In November of 2021, Janice made a series of decisions she would come to regret. Janice had finished her master’s degree and was looking for work in Public Health. Although she had endured the hard and grueling winters of Baltimore all through undergrad, she had returned to the heat and humidity of Texas that welcomed her like a warm blanket. When she got a job offer in Iowa City, she once again felt the ominous chill of the north wind. Despite her best instincts, she answered the call to adventure and decided to build her resume yet again. Janice accepted the position, gathered up her fussy and fuzzy companion, Mocha, and packed her life into her orange Jeep heading to the great plains of Iowa.

In November of 2021, Keith was careening toward the end of law school. Many of his law school friends already had jobs lined up or were also at their wits end trying to market their limited experience. Keith would have accepted work anywhere but of course his primary goal was to stay where it was cold. Kansas City or St. Louis would be fine. He had lots of friends in Missouri, and the cities were basically at the same latitude as Carbondale, so he had learned to endure the longer summers during undergrad. Mind you, he did so by strategically escaping north every May and returning no earlier than August, but he would be willing to suffer a little bit for gainful employment.

Much to their chagrin, Keith and Janice met on Bumble. Keith was entranced by Janice’s adventures in the Amazon where she devoured the fearsome Piranha. Janice made the brave decision to go on an axe-throwing date.. If not for the devil’s bargain of online dating, Keith and Janice never would have met. This is because Keith did not participate in roller derby and Janice did not go to the law library to read the riveting case of Pierson v. Post.

Despite his best efforts, Keith graduated from Law School and found a job at the eighth largest city in Iowa. For the purposes of this narrative, we will call this great city “an hour and a half away from Janice”. Janice had been abandoned in Iowa City by the boy she had been dating for less than seven months. As another Iowa winter dawned, Janice made the difficult decision to return to Houston, or as Keith referred to it, “sixteen hours away from Keith and closer to the equator”.


For the next year and a half, both of our heroes remained resolute in staying sixteen hours away from each other. Despite this, Keith and Janice made every excuse to see each other and travel together. They visited the heights of Breckenridge and the plains of Zimbabwe. Janice was frozen like a popsicle on their trip to the Cahokia Mounds and Keith was melting like a candle in the heat of Stillwater. In Fall of 2024, Keith became quite certain that Janice would not be returning to the land of snowy winters and so he gathered up his furry companion, Scathach, and ventured closer to the equator than he had ever dreamed; all to be closer to Janice.

In the great city of Houston, Janice taught Keith many things about driving in traffic, wearing boots to the Rodeo, and enjoying the cancerous rays of the sun. She lovingly chased him with sunscreen and reminded him that sunscreen was a daily application product in Texas. Janice attempted to convince Keith that the humidity of Houston was “like a warm hug” but I assure you dear reader that it is far less pleasant than even the most aggressive of hugs. After Keith had alphabetized all of Janice’s books and Janice returned the next day with yet more books, Keith realized that this would likely be a long-term project and so he would need to apply for a full time position as Janice’s librarian.

In February of 2025, Keith took Janice on a romantic trip to Yosemite to try and see the “firefall”, a rare event where Horsetail waterfall turns bright red in the glow of the setting sun. Though they did not see the falls light up, Janice may have been too busy admiring her engagement ring to notice.

We are so excited for you all to continue the adventure with us in Vail!